Applies more to those who have dependants and those who are expected to later provide for their families
Choose Your Battles Pick certain things that you are willing to support. For example, you can help with education. That way, you will not get ad-hoc financial requests for parties or fashion items.
Set A Deadline Let it be known upfront when you expect to see the fruit when helping someone to allow you to focus on your savings objectives..
Plan For The Unexpected Invest in financial vehicles such as funeral cover that can help you smooth out financial stress related with helping when there are family funerals.
Give But Don’t Spoon-feed Don’t destroy the person that you are giving to by letting them depend on you. Help them empower themselves so that they too can give to others.
Let Everyone Take Responsibility Work with your extended family to help them make sound financial decisions when they start earning an income. Sometimes you need to let everyone experience the discomfort of their bad financial decisions for them to learn to make better decisions.
Exercise Financial Discipline You cannot do an infinite number of things with a limited amount of money. You need to trade off, otherwise you will end up so heavily indebted that you may even lose your assets.
Put Money Aside For Yourself Give what is left after you’ve saved for retirement. Ensure that you will retain independence in your old age, otherwise you will perpetuate the cycle of dependency.
Instill Financial Discipline In Your Immediate Family Start with your own siblings if you’re able to have those conversations or start these dialogues with friends who have taken the role of family where you are. Let them know that you have a budget to stick to when you shop. Help each other understand the need and practice of sticking to a budget, keep each other accountable.
Stay engaged. Take part in college activities if you’re in school and find social groups or activities you can be part of that you can identify with invest in your relationships with friends and in your relationship with yourself through hobbies and personal interests, keep up to date with what’s going on around you and try not to isolate yourself too much particularly when you feel yourself sinking into negative thoughts.
Establish a personal routine. “If you are someone who goes to bed early and everyone’s staying up late, it’s OK to go to bed early,” says psychologist Josh Klapow.
Do something to feel closer to home. Write a letter, look at a family photo, engage with people from your country who are local…of course these relationships have to feel and occur organically, you don’t have to force it. Try to do certain things you did or do at home, such as eating certain meals, listening to certain music…etc
Talk to someone. Seek out people who either understand what you’re going through or have similar feelings. Pity parties in this case aren’t a bad thing, says Klapow. “It’s sort of like a grief support group.”
Time flies. Think that time is actually pretty short to make time go by faster.